Why I Can’t Have Kids Episode 1

Because I would totally make my child unnecessarily get braces after puberty hits and keep them through the age of 18, just to assist in preventing them from getting play.

Owl Costume Wanted

THIS IS THE OVERALL LOOK ^^

I’d pay extra for the CAPE shown below from SAVING ARTIST RYAN.

So ideally I would LOVE something like this… with the eyes, beak, multiple brown/oranges on the skirt instead of the blue. The middle area would still be darker to represent the body of the owl. Gold hues and fun patterns encouraged!!

Here’s some other awesome color combos that I have seen out there:

JennRocket made a tutorial/guide here along with fun photos of her and friends.

I love how BIG her “feathers” are along with their shape (pointy).

I am in LOVE with the pattern and the CAPE!!

<< SAVING ARTIST RYAN

http://fromdahliastodoxies.blogspot.com/2011/10/diy-lady-owl-costume.html

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Wood Wall Design – Painting Wood Slices

All My Friends Are Dead

When He Says I’m Busy

“If he’s not calling you, it’s because you are not on his mind. If he creates expectations for you, and then doesn’t follow through on little things, he will do same for big things. Be aware of this and realize that he’s okay with disappointing you. Don’t be with someone who doesn’t do what they say they’re going to do. If he’s choosing not to make a simple effort that would put you at ease and bring harmony to a recurring fight, then he doesn’t respect your feelings and needs. “Busy” is another word for “asshole.” “Asshole” is another word for the guy you’re dating. You deserve a fcking phone call.”
― Greg Behrendt

“I’m about to make a wild, extreme and severe relationship rule: the word busy is a load of crap and is most often used by assholes. The word “busy” is the relationship Weapon of Mass Destruction. It seems like a good excuse, but in fact in every silo you uncover, all you’re going to find is a man who didn’t care enough to call. Remember men are never to busy to get what they want.”
― Greg Behrendt

Putting too much effort in a relationship?

 

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Men enjoy a chase, and taking away that natural instinct will only worsen the problem. You want a man who enjoys you… the real you… not the insecure you. A man will tend to lose his feeling if he’s feeling that he’s not contributing to your life. A man who wants someone he feels he is dragging down is no man at all! Here’s my recommendations for how to assure you are getting what you deserve, and that he deserves you!
 

If you find that you are continuously doing the contacing, initiating plans, and just plain thinking about him way too much… you can take steps to see where he is at without the difficult or drama filled conversation. In reality, doing all the work on your own drains you emotionally and takes away the chase and ability to allow a man to feel he has “won” you. Believe it or not, a man can’t fall for you if you are doing all the giving. In reality, you’ll probably end up coming off needy – and that’s just not attractive to any kind of man worth keeping.

 
Remember… actions speak louder than words. Stop letting him enjoy the free ride and see how much effort he’s willing to put in. Whatever efforts you are not seeing returned should stop. Let him initiate plans, contact, and conversation. See where he lies. Most women struggle with the balance between letting him know you are interested, but if you’ve made efforts and met a wall… clearly something needs to give. Give him room to make a decision or fight for you. Never, never, never EVER try to pressure a man into commitment. It simply won’t work out for either of you. If it’s forever… what’s the rush anyway?

All that effort you are going to have bundled up you used to put into him should instead be put into YOURSELF. Remember all those hobbies and friends you’ve put on the back burner? Recenter your energy on those things… or heck, pick up a new hobby! It’s the ONLY way you are going to free yourself from the over analyzing and fear you have about the relationship. Take the power out of his hands and put it back in yours. You might  be surprised to find all that fear was unwarranted. Remember relationships take TIME to build, and you are likley still getting to know each other.

The best thing about this process is that you’ll have a renewed sense of independence that will allow you to see the situation more clearly. In addition, the wrong man will show himself in a flash with this strategy. If he doesn’t step his game up, why are you playing with him to begin with? It might hurt to watch him leave, but in the long run you will still have yourself in the long run and are likley avoiding time wasted. The man you deserve will instead step up, notice the change, and pick up his efforts to keep you. When you feel tempted to do more – realize NOT doing more will be a bigger reward for both of you. When he gives that effort you’ve been seeking, be sure to show him how sweet it is by then giving back.

Blue Cheese Potato Salad Recipe

Office Haiku 05/13/2013

Sent clear instruction…

Alas, instructions ignored.

It is blasphemy!

I’m Comic Sans, Asshole.

BY Mike Lacher
– – – –
Listen up. I know the shit you’ve been saying behind my back. You think I’m stupid. You think I’m immature. You think I’m a malformed, pathetic excuse for a font. Well think again, nerdhole, because I’m Comic Sans, and I’m the best thing to happen to typography since Johannes fucking Gutenberg.

You don’t like that your coworker used me on that note about stealing her yogurt from the break room fridge? You don’t like that I’m all over your sister-in-law’s blog? You don’t like that I’m on the sign for that new Thai place? You think I’m pedestrian and tacky? Guess the fuck what, Picasso. We don’t all have seventy-three weights of stick-up-my-ass Helvetica sitting on our seventeen-inch MacBook Pros. Sorry the entire world can’t all be done in stark Eurotrash Swiss type. Sorry some people like to have fun. Sorry I’m standing in the way of your minimalist Bauhaus-esque fascist snoozefest. Maybe sometime you should take off your black turtleneck, stop compulsively adjusting your Tumblr theme, and lighten the fuck up for once.

People love me. Why? Because I’m fun. I’m the life of the party. I bring levity to any situation. Need to soften the blow of a harsh message about restroom etiquette? SLAM. There I am. Need to spice up the directions to your graduation party? WHAM. There again. Need to convey your fun-loving, approachable nature on your business’ website? SMACK. Like daffodils in motherfucking spring.

When people need to kick back, have fun, and party, I will be there, unlike your pathetic fonts. While Gotham is at the science fair, I’m banging the prom queen behind the woodshop. While Avenir is practicing the clarinet, I’m shredding “Reign In Blood” on my double-necked Stratocaster. While Univers is refilling his allergy prescriptions, I’m racing my tricked-out, nitrous-laden Honda Civic against Tokyo gangsters who’ll kill me if I don’t cross the finish line first. I am a sans serif Superman and my only kryptonite is pretentious buzzkills like you.

It doesn’t even matter what you think. You know why, jagoff? Cause I’m famous. I am on every major operating system since Microsoft fucking Bob. I’m in your signs. I’m in your browsers. I’m in your instant messengers. I’m not just a font. I am a force of motherfucking nature and I will not rest until every uptight armchair typographer cock-hat like you is surrounded by my lovable, comic-book inspired, sans-serif badassery.

Enough of this bullshit. I’m gonna go get hammered with Papyrus.

Fwd: Dogs, balls, and water

This is what happens when you take an under water camera…. a ball…. a pool….. a few pups…. and play fetch. 🙂

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